Sunday, December 19, 2004
I'm lonely. Ya noe u'r lonely when even rocks, trees or house lizards seem to sing to ya. Sometimes, I feel so lonely at home that instead of helping my mum wif the cooking, I'll make the fork talk to the spoon which gives hell to the knife, and b4 i noe it, my eardrums hurt frm the conversation.
Perhaps I need a boyfriend. The only person I am attached to right now is my shadow. But who shall be my one true love!? Which one!? WHICH ONE!? But...OH! They're all my type! But the idea of choosing is as absurd as favouring my right foot over my left! Sigh...
Oh sheesh...wat am I complaining to u ppl abt my pathetic life for? Oh yes...How can I forget...It's to make u ppl happy. I'm Miss Clown. My whole life is a comedy. Even complaining abt my loneliness might be funny to u ppl too. HA-HA...This is SOO funny...HA-HA...My sides are splitting...foo~ I can't breathe...Oh man...I'm even laughing at myself...I'm so goddamn funny! Nobody takes me seriously anymore. Well guess wat ppl? Sometimes u have to noe when the clown is simply not being funny.
Friday, December 17, 2004
Let me make dis clear to EVERYONE. Asian horror movies...they dun scare me. Now, dun get me wrong...I'm not Miss Brave. If somebody committed suicide by jumping to her death frm her flat, I would be too scared to walk anywhere near dat area in case her wandering spirit exist. But movies like Shutter, Ju-On or wat have u simply aint scary to me anymore. They dun give me nightmares. Pee Wee gives me nightmares. So, if u want me to watch a movie wif u, it better NOT be an Asian ghost flick cuz it'll make me
sick...
But if u'r the kind of person who wants to see a horror movie turned comedy, ask me along. Oh wait, I changed my mind. I wanna watch a movie tat keeps me and others entertained...NOT
me entertaining others abt the movie!
Watching Shutter (3 or 4 weeks ago) was a bad experience for me. Some of the girls in the cinema...
DAMN were they irritating!! I dunno which one's worse. The movie's sound effects or their screamings. A bunch of minahs on my left were screaming n screaming like f**ken monkeys in a cage...
When they're not screaming, they're 'yaking' away. Yak...yak...yak... Yak...Yak...Yak... "Oi! Diam ah Minah!", I
said...dunno whether they heard me or not...maybe not cuz their gaps were still open
I seriously dun understand ppl who pay 6-8 bucks on horror movies but then have their eyes shut throughout. Then, annoyingly start asking arnd, "eh wat happened ah? wat happened? eh...tell me ah...eh...eh..." YO! You spent 6-8 bucks to watch the unbelievably unscary ghost NOT the back of ur eyelids! I can do tat for
FREE! see?! *Shut eyes* Now, tat's
shutter for you. Pff~
Shutter wasn't scary lah. SEEERIOULY....I tink it was a
SAD movie. Overall, I tink Shutter was a shutter. Shutter as in...Zzz...Zzz...Zzz...
All the ghosts are starting to look the same to me. I'm starting to believe tat the
SAME actress is being recycled repeatedly and used in all the
DIFFERENT Asian horror movies. Her face getting stale ah ppl...I tink my own face scares me more than hers...
U noe wat...I tink I wanna make my own horror film. It's called
The Cinema...wooo
....It's abt this ghost who will sit on empty seats beside u...Brush her hair against ur legs frm below n appear in between ur legs screaming "Peak-a-boo!"...Steal ur popcorn and shove it up ur nose...Scary huh?
Thursday, December 16, 2004
I always have ideas on how I would torture ppl I hate. [Note: I'm a gd girl and in real life, I would never hurt a soul...so I use my imagination to satisfy my desire to torture] Ok, at this moment, I have this particular person in my mind...
Right now, I shall be an artist. My tool isn't the paintbrush...or the pencil...or watever...it's simply a small sharp knife. This knife of mine can create masterpieces. It helps me carve not on wood, but on human bodies. The bodies I use are carefully selected. So, if u'r chosen, u shud feel honoured.
Today, this special person I chose is very lucky indeed. She will have her face restructured permanently. You may even call it a free facial makeover by me. She has a beautiful smile...but u noe wat...i dun think it's beautiful enuf. It needs to be a lot wider. With my faithful knife, I shall slice both sides of her lips so that it goes all the way up her ears. She'll be grinning from ear to ear...literally...forever...Her smile will be soooo freaking W I D E,it will make the Chesire Cat (frm Alice in Wonderland) proud..
She also has perfect eyes...but art is not always abt perfection rite? Rite....So, wif my knife, I'll carve out her left eyeball. Left or right it doesn't matter...jus one eyeball. Then, I'll let it dangle on its veins for......artistic effect......
Now, every piece of art has its significance. If not, it wouldn't be called art. So what does mine says? Well, ladies and gentleman...the
wide grin on her delicate
face clearly represents
happiness in the face of tough situations or sufferings. She is smiling VERY widely despite the pain she has to endure. It's something like...u shud always try to
look on the bright side of life. The idea of looking on the bright side of life is represented by her perfect
right eye. Her
left eye represents hardship, pain....watever bad things u can think of. Her left eye may be permanently destroyed...but it's
OKAY...cuz she still can depend on her perfect right eye. She's not totally blind so she's happy abt tat...i mean look...she's still SMILING! Her
dangling left eye also represents
endurance. The eyeball is just hanging on to dear life (the veins). We're struggling to hold on...but we still hold on...a never give up attitude...u noe?
This new piece of art work by me is not only for staring purposes...it can be quite functional too. All u need is a hose. Shove it into her mouth...(with a gap that big it isn't a very difficult task). Then try to manoeuvre the hose up her head and out of her left eye socket and WA LA~ A HUMAN FOUNTAIN! (Connect the hose to a tap first. Then, turn it on. DUH)
God noes wth I'm bulshitting abt right now...watever...keep smiling k?....*grins*
Wednesday, December 15, 2004
I'm sick! I still am! Yesterday was horrible! Today it's a teeny weeny bit better but I'm still sick n so i'm not happy. Been sick since Saturday! I had a temperature so high it felt as though I was in a devil's womb! My breath was so hot...I felt like a fire-breathing dragon! Sigh...and I was suppose to look for work dis week...
Eventhough I was sick, I still had time to talk on the phone and stuff...but ppl had to bear my croaky voice. I dunno how many times I had to repeat myself cuz they couldn't get watever I was croaking abt. I felt like a toad n I looked like one too.
K, cut the crap...One of the ppl I did chat on the phone wif was dis guy fren of mine. Most ppl have experienced staring incidences. Some ppl like it. Some ppl dun. Some ppl crave for it - the attention. Some ppl dun crave for it but they sure
look like they want the attention. So, dis guy fren of mine whom we shall call Poor Lil' Lost Boy doesn't like to be stared at. To him, its like one of the worse things tat could ever happen. Recently, he complained to me abt this old malay man who kept staring at him like nobody's business...Poor Lil' Lost Boy gets alot of stares frm ppl n sometimes if u'r not lucky, he'll go up to u n scold u. U noe...like.."stare, wat stare?! Not happy is it?!"...those kinda shit. But he's jus a normal boy wif bleached hair, piercings on his left ear, gold chains on his neck...normal kinda guy u noe? Hmm...It's really a wonder why ppl jus cant stop staring at him...Duncha wonder too? Let's wonder abt dis together..k...1..2..3..."HMMMM....!"
I'm really amused by ppl who simply hate to be stared at when they certainly make themselves look stare-rrible(stare + terrible). And I'm talking abt Mats n Ah Bengs wif really weird fashion sense...I narrowed it down to them cuz they are most likely to be the ones who will start the "Stare wat stare?!" phrase...
Ok, let's get back to Poor Lil' Lost Boy. One time, he complained to me abt his fren. This fren of his is a Muslim...or so he claims cuz he eats pork. Of course, anyone who noes anything abt Islam shud at least noe tat Muslims are not allowed to eat pork rite? So, Poor Lil' Lost Boy said, "He claims to be a Muslim but he eats pork! Wassup wif dat!?" I went, "Well, for starters, u dun pray, u drink beer, u bet/gamble, u dun fast, u pierced ur ear, blah blah...so wat makes u any different frm him? Why are u complaining abt him to me for?" That..my dear frens...ended our conversation abt his dear pork-eating fren.
Oh...there's Wuthering Heights right now on Channel I...bye..wanna watch..n I tink my mum jus caught my cold...n tat's bad...=S
Tuesday, December 07, 2004
I HATE
1) I hate Mondays
2) I hate the fact that I let ppl control me. I'm always giving in. This may be bad cuz one day I tink ppl may start to take advantage of it.
3) I also hate the fact that I never screamed at anyone b4. Basically, when i'm angry, I just keep quiet. Sometimes, I wish I could jus scream at him or her. But, I jus keep quiet 0r say things calmly or simply let him/her do the shouting infront of me. Ppl always tell me to jus let it out..but when I do, ppl may call me a bitch or something. Like WTF...
4) I hate bus service 63. I even think its starting to hate me. Jus now, I was heading for the bus-stop n I saw tat 63 had already arrived so I ran for it. It was sooo obvious I was running for the damn bus. The driver shud noe I was running for the damn bus. When I reached the doors, it f**cking hell closed on me!! Then, it opened, I alighted. I was only on the first step but he already closed the doors behind me n started to move. I was still unsteady damn it! Good thing I didn't lose my balance n toppled or watever. Anyway, I looked at him n called him an asshole...
Then, I was on my way back home from Cikgu's house. Was going down the stairs of the overhead bridge when I saw tat AGAIN 63 already arrived at the bus-stop. AGAIN, I had to run for it. AGAIN, it closed its doors on me. I knocked like shit on the door but the driver was really deaf. Either he was deaf or the TV Mobile was too loud. And waiting for the next bus takes a one hell of a long time. Ass...
5) I hate mats n minahs. I hate their dressing. Since when did tapered pants looked good on guys? Maybe, they dun have a full lenght mirror in da house so they cant see how horrid their bottom half look. On the other hand, their top half is jus as bad. Urgh...I hate them. I hate the way the walk. I hate the way they talk. I HATE THEM
6) I hate Tampines Mall. It's the Mat n Minah(M&Ms) central of the East.
7) I hate this particular boy yesterday. I was at the bus-stop waiting for...u guessed it...63...I was sitting beside Guy A. Then, moments later Guy B came along and took his seat by SQUEEZING between me n Guy A. Couldn't he see that the space between me n Guy A was really small?!! He tinks his ass is that small is it!??! ME...ME....I had to give way for HIM. So, I ended up sitting at the edge of the bench. A small edge u noe...And he was doing some stupid paperwork n I had to try avoiding his elbow frm hitting me on the face. The Ah pek standing beside me stinks like piss...
8) I hate Barbie. Who invented that bitch/bimbo?
9) Last but not least cuz the list of things I hate can continue forever n I dun intend to type forever, I hate myself...
Friday, December 03, 2004
Ok, everytime I head to starbucks, I'll order my usual Caramel Frap n then go somewhere else. But today was
different. Today, Liyana n I got
free drinks!!! Well, not really...we ordered 2 Caramel Fraps but we only paid for one. This is all thanks to Liyana. Liyana n tat guy was soo flirting right infront of my face man! I had to hide behind her the whole time cuz i feared I'd snort out loud or something. It was hard to keep a straight face u noe. N after we got our drinks, he wanted to give her his no. so tat next time when she wanna head there again she can call to see if he's working there or not...to get another free drink of course. Gosh, by tat time I really needed to leave tht starbucks...I really wanted to snort n laugh out loud. U wanna noe which starbucks? The one infront of Heeren at the Californian Fitness building.
Then, we headed to Heeren so tat Liyana can get her shades at 77th Street. We saw Leandra n Olinda. Liyana wanted to take pix with them...but our hands were full. I was busy carrying both drinks n she was busy wif her shades...when we're done...they're gone...no pix...oh well...Then, blah blah blah....we went home....lol, wat a sudden ending to this entry...sorry, wanna watch tv lah..
